Përse I Get Married So Young?

Dje kam bërë një ndalesë vonë natën në dyqan për të rrëmbyer disa gjëra dhe kam pasur një bisedë shumë interesante me turp. Kemi bërë muhabet si ajo skanuar sendet e mia, dhe pastaj ajo më ofroi një kartë zbritje, por i thashë gruaja ime tashmë kishte një të tillë. Kjo është kur biseda mori fun. Unë e di këtë bisedë shumë mirë, sepse unë kam pasur atë shumë herë më parë. Ajo shkon diçka si kjo ...

person: Çfarë!? Ju jeni i martuar?

më: Po unë kam qenë i martuar për dy dhe një vjet e gjysmë të mahnitshme.

person: Sa vjeç jeni? Ju duket si një fëmijë.

më: Unë jam njëzet e tre.

person: Ju jeni aq i ri! Pse në botë do ta bëni këtë?

më: Pse nuk do të ta?

Në 2009, Unë u martova në moshën mezi ligjore dhe mezi respektuar e njëzet e një vjeç. Gjatë periudhës së njohjes sime, angazhim, dhe martesa e shkurtër, Unë kam kërkuar kohë dhe prapë kohë pyetje si, "Pse martohen aq i ri? Çfarë është shpejton?”, dhe favorite e mia personale, "Ju duhet të keni pritur dhe gëzuar jetën tuaj!”

Disa nga folks kërkuar këto pyetje ishin të huaj, por disa ishin familja. Ishte I çmendur të martohen në një "e re e tillë” moshë?

E pra më lejoni t'ju jap tri arsye kam vendosur të martohen, kur kam bërë.

1. Takova një grua të perëndishme

Si një studente tetëmbëdhjetë vjeçare në kolegj Biblës, Unë nuk ishte aktive në kërkim për një grua, por Perëndia e pa të arsyeshme që të prezantoj me një grua të re simbas zemrës së tij. Ajo ishte e bukur, por më e rëndësishmja ajo e donte Jezusin. Ajo e dinte se ajo ishte një mëkatare nevojë për hirin e Perëndisë, dhe ajo kishte një përulur, zemra e aftë për shkollë. Ne përfundoi duke qenë pjesë e të njëjtit kishës, kështu që unë kam për të parë të saj të shërbejë, rritet, dhe me besnikëri të japë kohën e saj për të tjerët. Fillova të flas me rrethin tim të brendshëm rreth saj. Shoket e mi, mentorëve, dhe pastorë të gjithë ranë dakord – ajo ishte një grua e perëndishme. Unë mund të shoh veten duke ecur me të dhe të dashur atë për pjesën tjetër të jetës sime.

2. Unë kam qenë i gatshëm

Në këtë kohë fillova të mendoj për realitetin e martesës dhe çfarë do të thotë për të kryer veten me dikë për një jetë. Pyeta veten nëse janë apo jo unë isha pjekur dhe përgjegjës të mjaftueshme. I kontrolluar me anë të Shkrimeve dhe menduar për përgjegjësitë e një burri, dhe biseduar me miqtë e martuar dhe mentorëve. Pas shumë lutjesh dhe bisedë, mentorëve e mia dhe pastorë në kishën time më tha se ata mendonin se unë isha gati për të ndjekur atë. Unë kam qenë në gjendje të gëzuar. Por unë nuk do të kishte ndjekur atë nëse unë mendova se nuk ishte i përgatitur për të shpirtërisht të çojë e saj, të sigurojë për të, dhe të jetë kreu i një familjeje.

3. Martesa është një bekim

Në fillim ndjeva si unë kishte për të provuar të naysayers se duke u martuar e re është në rregull ndonjëherë. Por, kur kam shikuar në Shkrimet e unë nuk e kam gjetur gjëra si, "Martesa është e barabartë me vdekjen! Ikni nga ajo!” ose, "Vendos martesën off deri sa ju nuk mund të vënë atë më gjatë,” ose, "Vetëm martohen, kur ju jeni shumë i vjetër për të shijuar jetën,” ose, "Luaj në fushë për një kohë dhe pastaj të marr një më të mirë.”

Në vend të kësaj kam gjetur komandat si, "Ikni epshin rinor”, dhe kam lexuar pasazhe të tilla si Urta 18:22 që thotë se, "Kush ka gjetur grua ka gjetur një gjë të mirë dhe ka siguruar një favor nga Zoti.”

Pra, kur njerëzit thonë, "Çfarë të pushtuar për t'u martuar në mënyrë të rinj?” Përgjigja ime e re është, "Ju jeni duke i kërkuar pyetjen e gabuar.” Unë mendoj se në rrënjët e kësaj pyetje është supozimi se martesa vjedh diçka larg meje, sikur rinia ime është duke u tretur në dashuri sakrifikuese të kryer, kur ai mund të përdoret për kënaqësi rastësor dhe i ciflosjes.

Martesa është një dhuratë e bukur nga Perëndia! Ajo është një mjet i hirit. Kam gjetur një grua, dhe kjo është një gjë e mirë. Unë nuk pajtohem me logjikën që thotë, shtyrë bekimet më të pasura të Perëndisë për aq kohë sa ju mund të. Në vend të kësaj unë do të thoja të gëzojnë dhurata të mira e Perëndisë dhe steward ato për lavdinë e Tij.

Kjo nuk do të thotë se të gjithë duhet të martohen, kur kam bërë. Ajo do të kishte shkuar keq në qoftë se unë do të kishte provuar të martohen para se të ishte i gatshëm. Disa prej nesh kanë nevojë për të pjekur më shumë, dhe të tjerët prej nesh duhet të lutemi për kënaqësi dhe të besojnë Zotin dhe kohën e tij. Qëllimi im nuk do të thotë se më i ri që të martohet, më shumë shenjtë jeni. Unë vetëm dua të hedhin poshtë mitin se ne duhet të vonojë moshën madhore dhe vetëm të marrë në konsideratë martesën e një herë ne jemi të tridhjetë apo më të vjetër.

No Regrets

Mbrëmë në eksitim dikush më pyeti nëse unë vjen keq duke u martuar në mënyrë të rinj. Përgjigja ime? Absolutisht jo.

Kjo është një nga vendimet më të mira që kam bërë ndonjëherë. Unë jam i lumtur dhe i shenjtë se unë kam qenë dy vjet e gjysmë më parë, dhe kjo është një gjë e mirë. Unë nuk dua ta bërë atë të duket si unë jam një anomali super të rralla. Unë e di shumë njerëz që u martua po aq të rinj apo më të rinj se unë. Edhe ata e panë martesën si një dhuratë dhe e kam parë frytet e kësaj dhurate. Unë dhe gruaja ime mund të jetë e re tani, por unë jam lutur për hir të dua gruan time dhe deri në fund të jetës sonë. Deri atëherë unë dua të binden urtësinë e Fjalëve të Urta dhe "gëzohu me nusen e rinisë sime.”

AKSIONET

92 comments

  1. Jannon Fitzpatrickpërgjigje

    I respekt nuk pajtohem me Kevin Ferere. Ju nuk mund të di se çfarë dashuria është deri sa ju e dini se kush është Perëndia, sepse Perëndia është dashuri! Bibla nuk thotë asgjë në lidhje me takim rreth ose të ndërveprojnë me të tjerët për të gjetur se një. Në fakt, Isaac shtrire mbi mbi Rebekës dhe e dinte se ishte ai për të. Ai nuk e bëri date rreth ose të bisedoni me Lean, që të kështu që nëse ajo ishte më e mirë kështu që ai do të dinë nëse janë apo jo Rakela ishte me të vërtetë ajo që ai donte ose jo.

    Duke folur nga përvoja ime personale, I ka data të tjerët dhe të gjetur atë që dashuria nuk ishte. Jo vetëm nga marrëdhëniet e mia, por nga prindërit e mi’ dhe motrat’ marrëdhëniet. Problemi ishte, ata ishin jo marrëdhënie të bazuara në Word ose dashurisë së Perëndisë dhe kjo është arsyeja pse ata nuk punojnë jashtë. Unë e kam gjetur një njeri i perëndishëm, kështu që mund të punojnë jashtë në mënyrë që ju thoni, POR I gjithë zemër besoj se në qoftë se unë do të kishte pritur dhe ruajtur zemrën nga këto marrëdhënie të tjera që nuk ishin të drejtë për mua, Unë do të kishte qenë në pozitë shumë më të mirë dhe më pak të thyer, të recieve burrin tim nga perspektiva e një gruaje e Perëndisë, dhe jo perspektiva e një gruaje të thyer me bagazh për të punuar me.

    Nuk ka mungesë respekti për qëllim, por besoj se është një deklaratë shumë e gabuar batanije që mund të vërtetë të rri zemrat e rinj në drejtim të gabuar. (informacion në lidhje me Google hyjnore takim vs. modern Dating. Ka disa gjëra me të vërtetë mirë në atje.)

    • KevinFererepërgjigje

      Ju gjithashtu provoi me të drejtë. Bibla mund të them çfarëdo qoftë ajo dëshiron, por ju jeni përvojat janë të gjitha që ju duhet të shkoni jashtë e. Dhe të cilin ju e quani Zotin vjen nga një kulm të asaj që ju jeni mësuar dhe përvojat tuaja. Në fund, atë që ju besoni është një zgjedhje, por ajo që ju e dini se është e imponuar nga realiteti.

      dhe vërtet, deklarata mund të jetë pak i përgjithshëm, por ajo duhet të merren me një kokërr kripë, si në çdo gjë.

      • Lokelani70përgjigje

        Unë gjithashtu respekt nuk pajtohem me Kevin Ferere.
        E vetmja gjë që është provuar është se ju keni bërë një vendim ndërgjegje të mos për të jetuar jetën tuaj për Perëndinë me anë të fjalës së tij, Bibla. ndërsa, ne kemi bërë vendimin për të jetuar jetën tonë në një martesë të perëndishme, me anë të fjalës së Perëndisë. Fakti i çështjes është, nuk do të ketë kuptim të plotë të këtij blogu në qoftë se Perëndia nuk është vënë për herë të parë në jetën e dikujt.
        Duke u lutur për të gjitha martesat! Zoti bekofte!

        • KevinFererepërgjigje

          Unë e kam bërë një vendim të ndërgjegjshëm për të gjetur Perëndinë për veten time dhe jo me atë që dikush më ka mësuar. Mos u shqetësoni, I përdorur të jetë ashtu si ju.

          • AC

            Unë vetëm do të doja të them, ju nuk mund të gjeni Perëndinë. Bibla thotë që ne jemi të vdekur. të vdekur mund të bëjë asgjë. Perëndia na gjen.

        • Lokelani70përgjigje

          oh… Unë jam aq i keq Kevin, ju duhet të ngatërrohet. Perëndia I shërbej nuk është një Perëndi i vetë-kërkuesit. Shqetësuese nuk është vullneti i Perëndisë, por i dashur eachother aq sa Ai na do është! Ashtu si kam shkruar më parë, vënë Perëndinë të parin është ajo që është e nevojshme për të kuptuar plotësisht këtë blog, si përgjigjen tuaj dëshmon pika ime. Mund çdo gjë që thotë dhe të bëjë të jetë i kënaqshëm për Perëndinë. Zoti e bekoftë dhe kanë veten një mbrëmje të mahnitshme.

        • Fru-Mukete Arnoldpërgjigje

          hahaha, mbani duke kërkuar, ju do të gjeni atë- mos harroni krijimi zbulon edhe atë. Në fakt, Unë do të ju jap një mashtrim, vetëm të vini Biblën dhe do të hedhin atë si një libër histori duke vënë në dukje të gjitha pretendimet që bën dhe madje memorizimin e tyre pas, shikoni libra të tjera dhe krahasoni kërkesat. Por patjetër ju do të duhet dikush për të shpjeguar ju ca, mos lër as edhe që ju jeni një kërkues i së vërtetës.

        • KevinFererepërgjigje

          Nëse besoni në Zot sa më shumë që ju thonë se ju bëni, pse ju ndjeni nevojën për të provuar atij aq shumë? Unë nuk kam për Perëndinë, sepse Ai është në mua. Unë jam Atij dhe Ai është më. Por unë jam i keq, ju nuk mund të kuptojnë se mund të?

        • Delinabinipërgjigje

          Unë nuk pajtohen se si mund të jetë Perëndia dhe se si mund të jetë Perëndia ju ka ju në të vërtetë të krijuar veten nëse keni qenë Perëndia?

        • KevinFererepërgjigje

          Gabimi im, gabim daktilografimi: *Unë nuk kam për të provuar Perëndinë. *

          Por komenti do të thotë atë që thotë. Çdo gjë që është brenda jush, kjo është ajo që ju jeni të. Mos kini frikë për të pranuar këtë të vërtetë vetëm për shkak se ju jeni mësuar se kjo është e gabuar.

  2. Addis Hunterpërgjigje

    100 % me ju! Edhe unë u takua me burrin tim në 20 dhe një vit më vonë u martuam. Unë kam pasur të ketë të njëjtat biseda me të huaj të rastit, familjes dhe miqtë dhe unë dua të ju inkurajojmë që të qëndrojnë besnikë Zotit dhe gruan tuaj të bukur në çdo mënyrë që është discribed në fjalë. Burri im dhe unë jemi tani 30 vjeç dhe kur unë them njerëzve unë kam qenë “për fat të mirë” martuar për gati 10 vjet ata gulçoj!!! “vërtet”?? Marrja e njëjta komentet paqarta të “humbur rininë tonë” etj etj. Por Perëndia ka qenë aq i mëshirshëm dhe i mirë me ne se unë nuk mund të shpreh me fjalë se sa e bekuar jam unë që kam takuar burrin tim, kur kam bërë. Ne dashuri reminising në vitet tona të universitetit së bashku, dhe ëndërruar për të gjitha gjërat e mëdha që jeta ka për ne përpara! Ne kemi 2 vajza të bukura dhe një djalë fëmija në rrugë (që ne u lut me përulësi për këtë vit dhe Zotit të dhënë) , (atually Jam shkak sot ;-))..dhe ne couldnt të jenë më të sigurt se ajo ishte një bashkim Devine nga Perëndia për të na sjellë së bashku.

    natyrisht, ne nuk jemi të përsosur (edhe pse miqtë e mi duket se mendojnë kështu, sepse ne dont përballen me probleme të përbashkëta të kësaj bote të pabesisë, mosrespektimi dhe të argumentuar të vazhdueshme), por ne kemi mosmarrëveshje, luhatje humori, dificulties financiare etj, dallimi është se ne mbështetemi te Perëndia për të udhëhequr hapat tona, ne e respektojmë njëri-tjetrin dhe të përpiqemi të mira tona për të mos humbur BESIM, komunikim, dhe të kërkojë udhëzime nga fryma e shenjtë si një çift dhe individually..My burri është individi më unike që kam takuar ndonjëherë dhe ne të dy e kuptojnë se çelësi i lumturisë në një martesë nuk është bërë apo blerjen “gjëra” për të bërë të lumtur, por eachother Duke ditur që ne jemi në Krishtin, duke ndjekur urdhërimet e Tij në lidhje me martesën dhe të dashur njëri-tjetrin pa kushte, pavarësisht nga të metat tona, ose se si ne mund të “ndihem” në atë moment , duke e ditur se lumturia do të jetë gjithmonë një emocion i përkohshëm që shkon larg, por JOY e vërtetë vjen vetëm nga Zoti.

    Unë uroj që ju dhe gruaja juaj shumë vite gëzimi Bekuar!!!
    I Love muzikë tuaj shumë nga rruga ;)..

  3. ngaspërgjigje

    udhëtim,

    Ju jeni një shembull i madh për të krishterët e rinj të cilët duan të lavdëruar Perëndinë në mënyrën se si ata trajtojnë gratë! Faleminderit! Unë vetëm u fejua, jam 22, dhe të shohim përpara për të shërbyer Zotin në martesë për vitet që vijnë!

  4. Johnny_renteriapërgjigje

    Besoni apo jo, por i martuar në moshën 18. Unë kam qenë në asnjë mënyrë e gatshme të jetë një burrë në kuptimin financiar dhe unë isha tashmë një babai. Por unë sapo kishte dhënë jetën time deri në Krishtin dhe e dija se gratë unë ishte me të do të jetë ai rritet me mua. Njerëzit pyesin mua të njëjtat gjëra si. Më duket e trishtuar se edhe pse martesa shihet si një gjë e keqe. sot, Unë isha duke menduar për këtë dhe kam ardhur në përfundim se njerëzit janë bërë kaq egoist që mendohet të marrë përgjegjësinë e një personi tjetër pothuajse e pamundur. Marriage is not about when and why you got married but about who is centered around that marriage. And it should be christ

  5. deborahpërgjigje

    i think u r right trip..i have a frnd who got married @ 19 (they hv been married 4 6 yrs nw)n lkng @ her now we realize apart from accepting Christ in her life dat is d best decision she has ever made….though i must admit i am not ready 2 get married..it scares me cos i don’t want 2 be hooked 2 d wrong person 4 d rest of my life but i know Jesus will never let me make d wrong choicealso i sometimes wonder y get married when i get all i want from Jesus n he can never brk my hrt?….ur decision was right n i gv u thumbs up 4 dat!:)

  6. Lance Petersonpërgjigje

    Mbresëlënës. My son also got married 2 1/2 years ago to a wonderful godly woman and they were both the ripe old age of 19. Your story reminded me of them.

  7. Brandon Clementspërgjigje

    I love this Trip! I got married at 22 and I absolutely love my marriage. It’s funny because I just had a similar conversation with a gas station attendant about a month ago. She pulled the whole, “Why get married when you can have the milk for free?” question and my heart broke for her. Then I went on to tell her that my wife was not a cowthat she was awesome and I love her.

    Faleminderit për shpërndarjen!

  8. Louib2001përgjigje

    Praise the Lord for you brother and your lovely wife of your youth. I pray that the Lord will pour favor continuously throughout your life, because you have obeyed his word. I am 28 and have been married now for almost two years and my wife and I have a happy marriage and a lovely 10 moth old baby. I always wanted to get married younger, but I believe it wasn’t time yet for me until the Lord brought my good thing almost 5 years ago (to be precise we met on the day we got born again 31 dhjetor 2006). I did not know we where destined to be together as I took her as an ordinary sister from church. I was also concentrating on my spiritual growth, but three years ago my eyes opened and the rest as they say is history.

    It is in Satan’s agenda for people not to be married, so that they live in sin and we already know what will happen. Have we looked at the rate of divorce in the body today? How about brothers and sister fornicating in the church, because of what society dictates.

    If we look at how our cities are filled with youth violence today, do we take a moment to think of some of the root causes? The moment man exchange Godly values for circular ism all this fell apart. Even Christian parents are ignorantly promoting circular ism by discouraging their children not to get married young (at the age of concern obviously). The reasons are I quoteyou need to get an education, maybe when you finish your masters and have a decent job, then start to think about marriage”. That sound wise doesn’t it ? So what happens when your Christian child is goes to university and then moves in with boy/girl friend whose either Christian or non?

    Please do not get me wrong(that’s just some of the things I have come across), because the above statement does not apply to all. Education is very important as one acquires knowledge for their respective profession so they could work and provide for their future families etc, but marriage wont stop one from succeeding in what ever area in life one chooses to follow, as a matter of fact a marriage in general promotes growth i.e great ministry, good heath, wealth and the list goes on. Remember the two becomes one flesh and can chase 10 000 Uau, that means that in agreement what ever they ask God faithfully they will attain, mbresëlënës…..

    In close I would like to suggest that we as Christians start teaching our children at a young age on the importance of first living for God and secondly the importance of marriage( to those who’ve been given the gift) so that they grow up wanting to please God in this area. Once again well done my brother and to all those living the word of God. Qëndro i bekuar.

  9. Annapërgjigje

    This really spoke to me. Une jam 21 in a relationship and I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been told that I’mtoo young to be thinking about settling down”, I should wait tolive life first”, finish school and establish a career before I enter courtship/marriage. You have an amazing and inspiring testimony. I wish you and your wife a lifetime of blessings and happiness together!

  10. anonymouspërgjigje

    I am 20 and have never been in a relationship so I’m not going to be married by 21 but I definitely respect your logic. I always have the mindsetto each his own”. I think you and your wife will definitely go the distance and I’m so proud of the steps that you took prior to marriage. It looks like both of you took the committment very seriously, which I applaud.

  11. Tony Doyleypërgjigje

    Very blessed to read your blog about marriage at an early age. My wife got married at 18 and we have been happily married for 10 years now. Sure we’ve had some ups and downs, but I believe God has guided us steadily all these years and now we are stronger than ever. Thank you for your amazing testimony.

  12. KLE Photographypërgjigje

    Congrats on your young marriage! My husband and I went through the same thing when we got married 8 years ago at 20 years old! So we know exactly what you’re going through! People thought we got married because I was pregnant (I wasn’t) or because he was an illegal alien (he’s an American citizen). We didn’t have much of our friends in our corner as they were doing the single thing. But now at 28 they are coming around and trying tocatch up.I’m glad God blessed me with my husband regardless of my age. God bless both of you!

    BTW We live in the DMV area! (MD) maybe we all can meet up or go to church together! We still don’t have married friends lol.

  13. KevinFererepërgjigje

    I don’t think anything is being stolen from you, it’s what you’re giving up. It’s cool to have structure in the Bible, but it’s up to you to dictate your life, not a book; despite the guidance that it provides.

    It’s commendable being committed and young, but part of thatyouthful lustis the learning and growing you get from meeting and socially engaging different women. Learning what you like and don’t like to do, see, and feel; instead of your scope being so limited to just one person.

    You can’t really say you know who you are and what you’re about, or even what you really want, if you haven’t interacted but so much with other women for them to show that to you. You don’t know what Love is if you don’t know what it’s not.

    • mysafirpërgjigje

      You do not need to know what Love is not if you know what Love is. How would you know if someone gives you a fake $100 bill unless you know what the real $100 bill look like. There is only one real $100 bill, just study that and you can tell when someone gives you a fake. The same with love. There are many counterfeits out there, but if you know what the real is, then you will be able to spot the fake. Since God is love, anything ungodly cannot be love.

      • KevinFererepërgjigje

        Hence you must date around and meet and have sex with other people. My point exactly. What is ungodly is subjective. You may try to be legalistic about it because it is in our nature to do so, megjithatë, we must let go of these ideals being that there is too much grey area amid the context.

        • Angeldoll1përgjigje

          I disagree with your statement having sex with other people- STD’s, AIDS and unwanted pregnancies, are the consequences of such relationships. If one pursues such relationships, they would not learn about proper commitment and the deeper and spiritual aspects of love rather than lust. Also I disagree with your views about dating around before you want to commit becausedating aroundis not a prerequisite to know a spouse from a nonspouse. Godly courting/dating was made for humans as depicted in the Bible whereas having mutiple partners, having random sex are the traits of animals.

          • AJ

            Angeldoll1it’s pretty naive of you to think that all non-marital sex necessarily leads toSTD’s, AIDS and unwanted pregnancies”… but of course, you wouldn’t know that if you haven’t taken to time to get your head out of your dusty old book and gain some life experience.

        • KevinFererepërgjigje

          You look at it negatively. If you’re mature and wise enough you’ll go about it the right way. The more you avoid something, the closer you come to it. Focus on the positives and that’s what you’ll get. But of course your religion doesn’t teach you that.

    • ngaspërgjigje

      Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.” (nevojtore 15:13) You know what love is if you know Christ.

      • KevinFererepërgjigje

        Please sir, if you’re going to regurgitate scripture, the least you can do is apply your own thought to it. It’s a reference, not a speech guide.

        • ellepërgjigje

          Your take on scripture is wrong and the way you think you’re projecting yourself as a Christian who doesn’t follow the Bible butreferencesit but chooses to live by your own code and picks and chooses what, if anything to follow that’s of God is concerning….

          Most of what you’re claiming to stand on is false doctrine.

  14. Gabe Tavianopërgjigje

    Nice to see you blogging here Trip! Thanks for praying for me this week, God sure has been good.

    The crazy thing about you getting married so young is that your ears and eyes have been opened to God more in your few years than some that have closed Him off for much longer. You know that God is a part of your marriage just as much as the two of you are, and that’s huge. Faleminderit për shpërndarjen!

  15. Madeleine Farrellpërgjigje

    This is an excellent thought process. I got married at 17 and my husband was 19. At the time we were not Christian, and also, we did not ‘have toget married. Still for some reason we did. We have been married almost 28 1/2 years now, are parents of 5 and grandparents of 2. I LOVE my life. Not to say there were times in our marriage that one of us just wanted to walk away and never come back, not to say anger and resentment were not part of our daily lives for a season, or that thinking ew made the biggest mistake of our lives was not a thought process. But we committed. And when divorce is not an option, GOD brings the healing in time.

    My daughter got married at 20 and there was not one encouragement she ever got from people. She didn’t understand why people feel it is a last resort instead of a timely blessing. Even among the Christian community.

    Our son on the other hand got married at Christmas time, at the age of 27. Just hadn’t found the right girl. One thing.. the right boy/girl is going to e the right boy/girl even through the tough times. Just cling to The Cross.

  16. CLpërgjigje

    I couldn’t agree more. So many people seem to think that marriage is awful and there is especially no reason torushinto it, but it is something that God wants to use to bless and sanctify us. Thank you for the post!

    >>But when I looked in the Scriptures I didn’t find stuff like, "Martesa është e barabartë me vdekjen! Ikni nga ajo!"ose, "Vendos martesën off deri sa ju nuk mund të vënë atë më gjatë,"ose, "Vetëm martohen, kur ju jeni shumë i vjetër për të shijuar jetën,"ose, “Play the field for a while and then pick the best one.”

    • Anapërgjigje

      Thank you so much for the visit to my blogI think I figured out the feed adedrss for you (I posted it in my comments). You have a darling family, by the way! Congrats on your anniversary!

  17. Praisemovementpërgjigje

    Thanks for your transparency and formaking Jesus look good”. Mad respect for the way you livin’and bringinglory to the Word.

  18. Andrea Paige Jacksonpërgjigje

    That is a fantastic testimony. And you posted it on mine and my husband’s tenth anniversary! (We got married OLD, though.) : )

  19. Jcsmsoulpërgjigje

    god bless u brother! i know exactly what u mean although i found the lord later in life and i wish i was married to a godly man thats loyal to his wife! these dayz its very hard to find that! and another reason i hope and pray i get married and find the one is because u dont feel guilt when making love when ur married! god bless u!

  20. Jazminpërgjigje

    Thank you so much not every one will see marriage as a blessing. Only those that trust and believe in our Lord Jesus Christ will. I to got married at a very young age and at 28 years old me and my husband have 3 beautiful children and our lives are devoted to adore and worship our father in heaven. Marriage isn’t easy though, it has it’s ups and downs but through the grace and mercy of God and surrendering to his will one is able to grow. Thank you very much for your amazing story it is a true blessing. My the Lord continue to let you and your wife grow I ask for his wisdom and most of all many blessings in your favor.

  21. Tachy Musicapërgjigje

    I got married so “i ri” as well, and this is a blessing, we always together (including our daughter of course), we share everything, and help each other, some ppl think that if you get married so young it will be for a short time, but thanks God we almost 8 years married and the most important trying to servinGod at all times…bekimet

  22. Agopylove09përgjigje

    that is so awesome!! im 25 and ive been thinking about what all comes along with being a good wife and truly being submissive and having god as your center and always seeking his counsel for it all and just truly letting christ take the lead and building that relationship on the solid ground of christ jesus..falling in love with our savior first is truly a must!! having that intimate relationship with HIM alllows you to grow and know what love really is and GOD provides that love that u give to your spouse.. so greatful for a savior Who always provides..<3

  23. Joe Stevenspërgjigje

    Am an oldee who agrees fully with Triplee. Though of course it is different strokes (ages) for different folks. And everyone must marry at their God-designed time. I am 50 yrs old, got married to my sweetheart when I was 23 and she was 20! tani 27 years and 1 month later, there is continuous (mirë) fireworks between us, still madly in love, best friends and walking together in God’s purpose. Wouldn’t trade the age I married for 6 months later! But even my kids must know their circumstacces are not necessarily identical to ours, nor are God’s timings and plans for them exactly the same.

  24. Femi Olowopërgjigje

    Am an oldee who agrees fully with Triplee. Though of course it is different strokes (ages) for different folks. And everyone was marry at their God-designed time. I am 50 yrs old, got married to my sweetheart when I was 23 and she was 20! tani 27 years and 1 month later, there is continuous (mirë) fireworks between us, still madly in love, best friends and walking together in God’s purpose. Wouldn’t trade the age I married for 6 months later!

  25. Reverandjeffpërgjigje

    I know this one all too wellJust celebrated our 13th year of marriage, and i’m 35.. I had the same folks question me the same way, but we both just knew God had ordained it and designed it. We intersected each other’s lives at PIVOTAL moments where we ended up being each others anchor, with a common anchor of Christ. The best part is when we get the chance to talk to younger people who are struggling with relationships/marriage and we get to tell our exceptional testimony !!! Faktikisht, had some of these discussions with JPaul some years ago.. Small world !!! God has given those who seek it the RIGHT VALUE system, and we VALUE our rib instead of runnin after chickenbones. :)

  26. Bobshumakerpërgjigje

    My Dad & Mom were high school sweethearts and they got married after graduation (both were 18 years old). They are still happily married to this day and have never express any regrets about their lives together. Becoming an adult might begin with marriageand your attitude concerning your decision mirrors my parents. Godly marriages are few and far between in this century….God will bless you and keep you happy for at least 50 ose 60 vjet!

  27. Jeffreycotton7përgjigje

    I thank you and your wife so much for sharing your stories. Une jam 21 and feel like i’m going through almost the same situation. I’m just not married yet. I have that mindset of why wait if you and your partner are in love, both are spiritual, pozitiv, and perfect through each others eyes. My girl and I have no doubt that we are going to be married one day. But even though we both want to be married, she’s more of a take her time; we have all the time in the world type person. I’m more of an ASAP we are not promised tomorrow type person. So why wait? She is a very smart girl. She reminds me of your wife and her story a little. Thinking that things might get in the way of school and career goals. But that’s more towards the talk of kids after marriage. I always tell her that I don’t want to have our first child close to 30 years old. I don’t want my body to start getting weaker because of age, which would make it harder and more tiring to play around with my kids. I want 7 at the most and 3 at the least. So its good to get started at a decent age. But I will continue to try to leave it in God’s hands and not worry about it too much.

  28. aneetarhpërgjigje

    thank u so much Trip n Jess, n everyone hu dt has shared an encouragement in one way or d oda. now i’m no longer scared of gettn married early especially considern d fact dt we both love God. God bls u

  29. Dashpërgjigje

    Jannon Fitzpatrick, I agree that God is love. The only way to experience true love is to experience the one who created love. Between to people we can create nothing to that caliber unless we are letting God guide our love lives as well. “Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friendsJhn 15:13. Love is not finding a self satisfaction (KevinFerere), or finding someone who can satisfy and stimulate electrical impulses in your brain. Ironikisht, your picture of theCreation of Adamon your page comes from the Renaissance period which was when the ideology of love and dating turned into something for the individual gratification no matter what the cost to someone else. That painting in itself is heretical stating that Adam is reaching out to God and took part in his creation. The Irony is this, Michelangelo at the end of his life saw what he had done and repented, trying to mix Christianity and Humanism (Man being the measure of all things). This ideology of love is where is I think you are coming from ? which is the same thing they practiced in Greek, Renaissance, and today’s culture. There really isnothing new under the sun”-Solomon, also from the Bible.

  30. Paul Jonespërgjigje

    hey trip been married since i was 22 dhe 28 tani. just had our 6th anv. god has bless us with 4 young ones. i pray that he keep blessing you and your family.

  31. CLLpërgjigje

    What a lovely testimony to the goodness of God and what He can do in lives that are totally surrendered to Him. My husband and I were married relatively young (në 24) and like you and your wife, God saw fit to bring us together for His glory. Our son married young, at age 20 earlier this yeargasp :-) and he definitely found a good thing in his godly wife. We wanted nothing more for him and it’s a blessing.

  32. Karendapërgjigje

    Çfarë një artikull i madh! My husband and I got married young as well, isha 22 and my husband was 25. We just celebrated 15 years of marriage. Jezu, has brought us closer together as a couple over the years, teaching us todie to ourselvesin order to better love and serve each other. Selfishness is the number one destroyer of most marriages.

    Thank you for your willingness to be up front and honest about the topic of marriage as it relates to Scripture!

  33. Michaelpërgjigje

    My wife and I married at 21 as well, and that was 11 years and 6 children ago (bio/adopted/foster). I didn’t know I wastoo youngto marry, I just knew she was the one I didn’t want to live without! God has been good.

  34. AJpërgjigje

    Reading between the lines: we loved Jesus and we were horny.

    I see this happen all the time among Christians and think arguments such as these that dance around the real motivation are hilarious. It’d be sinful to just have sex, so it’s far wiser to rush into a lifelong commitment.

  35. CLARApërgjigje

    The God that begun that Marriage shall surely see you through it all. You are an encouragement to young christian youths and couples Trip. Zoti ju bekoftë!!

  36. JOBpërgjigje

    I got married at the age of 21 and in the same year as you Trip Lee, in 2009. I met her in church when I was 16 years old and we have been together for almost 8 years now. We served God together with AYCM ministries, reaching out to villages and sharing the word of God in the Philippines. We told each other everydayI love you because I see how much you love God”. I do not ever regret asking her for her hand in marriage. The past 4 years of marriage has been a blessing.

  37. Isaacpërgjigje

    God’s word is indeed supreme. Fjalët e urta 18:22 clearly spells this out.
    Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord´´.
    My take for whoever wants to get married is to first and foremost ask for God’s direction in choosing the right partner. We as humans shouldnt make our own choices and forcifully ask God to bless it. më tepër, we should surrender in total obedience, reach out for God’s grace and ask for guidance to follow his direction for our lives.

  38. SteveMcMillonpërgjigje

    I respect this so much!! Its so encouraging because I have had a desire to be married ever since I was 6 yrs old and alot of people put me down for it. In many ways it created insecurities in me. Thank you again for this!

  39. Terripërgjigje

    A little over 35 years ago I married my high school sweetheart. We were both 18, almost 19. We had many naysayers and my dad even hoped I would get divorced and find a doctor. When God arranges a marriage it doesn’t matter what the age of the bride and groom. Many blessings!

  40. Missypërgjigje

    I was married young as well (20 to be exact). Now at 32, I feel as though you can be married at any given age and at any given time to whoeverand God will use a person that loves Him in any circumstance to draw Himself closer to that personall you have to be is willing to be holy as He is holy. That’s why I don’t believe there isthe one”… Any persons who choose to get married, becomethe one’sfor eachother :)

  41. Johnnypërgjigje

    Shume faleminderit. My wife and I have a similar story. A friend posted this today and it was what I needed. Praise our Lord Jesus!

  42. Lisepërgjigje

    Thank you for this article! I am 36 years old and I have been married for 19yrsyep, isha 17 when I married my 18yr old husband! We have six kids, love The Lord and are very happy :) we are asked similar questions all the time and while it may not be a popular choice or the right choice for many, I am so happy and confidant everyday that we made the right choice for us.

  43. Steffanpërgjigje

    This is amazing. I know plenty of people who think this is the biggest mistake of your life. I am 22 and have really been considering this with someone I have known and loved since my sophomore year of high school. I am sure things aren’t sunshine and rainbows for you, nor do I expect it to be for me. I commend you for putting aside all of the negativity and looking at the larger picture and what you felt God lead you to. If no one else is ever happy for you, I truly am.

  44. Kim Hunterpërgjigje

    I met my husband at 14 we got married when I was 21 dhe ai ishte 23 we have been together for 22 years and married for 15 of those 22 there’s nothing wrong with getting married young its just how a person looks at life….because really your lifr is what you make it….and yes me and my husband are saved and believe in god and we are living our life for him with god all things are possible especially a long healthly loving marriage nothing easy but with god you can make it…….BE BLESSED!!

  45. Përmendja: Why did I get married so young? - Kingdom Cakers Kingdom Cakers

  46. Cherissepërgjigje

    What a blessing to know the Lord and to understand his word. I wish there were more people like you. Don’t let the Devil discourage you. We know he is everywhere.

  47. GrantYoungpërgjigje

    My wife and I got married when we were 22 and I had the same experience. Friends that were saved and unsaved wanted to let me know I had more life to live. My barber reminded me of all the clubbing and partying I could do. im “closefriends explained that there were other fish in the sea to explore. mirë, we actually got married around the same time 3 other couples our age did! We’re a minority but definitely not alone and it’s encouraging to remember that.

    By God’s grace we just celebrated 3 years and it’s been awesome! Thank you for sharing Trip!

  48. shenjëpërgjigje

    My take would be that if you are going to get married so young, you better know the consequences of doing so. It is very difficult even in the very best of circumstances. If you aren’t ready to work the hardest you’ve ever worked and totally sacrifice and deal with lots of disappointments and heartache, don’t sign up for it. megjithatë, if you can endure (and some people do) if can be rewarding at times.

  49. Kevinpërgjigje

    I love this biblically based perspective. It’s rare among American Christian, where the cultural and social structures are so anti-marriage, to see a young person, even an older person, have such a spiritually mature view on the value of God’s institution. Based on many of the comments I’ve read, this perspective sounds so foreign to people, even in the Church because we’ve allowed ourselves to lean towards the social norms of the day rather than the biblical truth of what God holds to be valued and treasured. Praying for you Trip, keep sharing the Gospel and the truth of God’s word made practical and real in the believer’s life.

  50. PastorRobpërgjigje

    I want to let you know Trip- Lee I got married 2 months after I turned 21. Is God all in it? Was He all in it despite people opinion and their reasoning on why I shouldn’t get married that I needed to wait. Man of God I have been married for 16 years now with 2 Beautiful girls and I am thoroughly greatful to God for a Godly wise, honorable precious jewel. The beauty about your testimony is it was meant for you to tell it!!!

  51. Përmendja: Single v. Married… | The Meaning of Life

  52. Mavispërgjigje

    I have advice for all young people. If you are 18 or over, start looking for a spouse! Sex outside if marriage will bring you nothing but heartache, leaness of soul and bad health, mental and physical. Being married is a joy and economic booster! You can get so much more done and enjoy lufe so much more if you are not alone. Your parents probably got divorced because they did not follow their hearts in their youth! I don’t have the space to explain it all, but you are built to be mated. Start making yor list of must have traits right away and marry young while you have your whole heart to give. I am 53 and very grayeful to be happily married. I was married at 31 -heartbroken many times and lots if wasted youth-way way too late. Hope done if you will be wise in your youth and enjoy it by being present in it!

  53. GOSPELMAGDOTCOMpërgjigje

    Dear Trip Lee,
    We appreciate reading your articles.
    Could you give us the authorization to translate your articles into french and to publish them on our website: gospelmag.com?
    Thank you very much in advance for your answer.
    Best in Christ,
    Marcel

  54. mëshirëpërgjigje

    My friend bought me this book when we were teens about being a young, dignified Christian woman. Of course it encouraged waiting until after marriage and everything and had verses throughout. It mentioned and she brought it up herself that God doesn’t want for us to date. I made a vow to myself that I would have boundaries with guys (I think I almost am completely done with outgrowing my shyness). I would save certain things for marriage but on and off the past 2 years I’ve gotten depressed. I’ve felt lonely. I wondered what’s wrong with me and if I’m good enough. I’m not. I don’t know every bible verse. I need to study a lot more. I’ve been trying and I don’t want to get to know just any guy because I can become heartbroken and he can lead me down a path God doesn’t want me down but I get lonely. It’s always beautiful to see other young people in love. It’s even BETTER if they’re married and I know it’s not good to be jealous but everyone says “oh, it’ll come during YOUR time”. I think about it regularly lately. I met this really nice guy. We have very similar personalities but he said he doesn’t go to church. He said he believes in God and I know I’m not perfect myself but I can’t help but wonder because I don’t think he’s actively seeking God if I’m going to regret something. Women aren’t supposed to try and change men I heard. It leads to disappointment supposedly. mirë, I’m tired of waiting. I guess I’ll learn the hard way. I’m not having sex though. Une jam 23 and still stand strong on that but I’m confused why I don’t deserve a husband now. Everybody else gets what they want. It’s so annoying that I can’t stop thinking about guys. I get so depressed sometimes. If I marry this guy and he hasn’t changed will we be unequally yoked? Some people have everything. And I’m not saying money. I just want someone who appreciates me. It’s too much to explain.

    • Nataliepërgjigje

      mëshirë:
      You are still only 23! :) Don’t worry about not finding the “e drejtë” one, there is not just one person out there that is a good option. And just to clarify: YOU ARE WORTH IT. There is a reason that you are you and on this earth at this time. You are precious to Jesus, just read and claim His promises when you start to think that you are not worth it. My favorite is: “I will never leave you or forsake you.
      Someone I knew recently got divorced, and a huge issue in their marriage was that she was a believer and he was not. A decision you will have to make will beis God worth it?” Keep seeking the Lord with all your heart, and HE will direct you. He will guide you. He will provide the encouragement you need when you feel overwhelmed and depressed. Something I have found very helpful is reading Scripture out loud before I go to bed, and especially when I feel down and under attack from the enemy. You never know what God has just around the corner.. if only you wait. I know it sounds so hard and honestly, annoying, but if you will keep seeking the Lord, He will satisfy you in this season. There is a reason you are in the season! You never know how God will use it as a testimony to help other young girls who are struggling with the same thing! :) I hope this helped in some way! bekimet!

  55. Michealapërgjigje

    I got married at 21 and it was beautiful
    You can’t help who you fall in love with or when you fall in love with them,
    I never thought I would be the type to marry young and miss out on thefun thingsin life .. but i don’t think i did, I just shared myfun thingswith someone I love and couldn’t imagine living without.

  56. Gissellepërgjigje

    Hi I’m Gisselle I’m from Honduras. Une jam 18 years old and my boyfriend is 19. We met 15 months ago in his church in New York! I live in Honduras.. Therefore it has been a long distance relationship. I’m in my second year of college and so as he. We’ve talked about getting married. And some of our relatives and elders from his church supports us and tell us is the best thing to do. I’m still insecure about it.. My mom isn’t too open about me getting married so young and so as my sisters. We have been praying since we first thought about marriage as a possibility. If you could write me to my email i would be grateful!

  57. Jenniferpërgjigje

    We were married 21 years ago. isha 19 and my husband was 21. We have drawn closer to each other and to God. Three kids later we are looking forward to the next 20.

  58. Charlespërgjigje

    I just wanted to say thank you for the straight forward way that you preach Gods word. I just watched the ‘Fallinmusic video after a day of trails and temptations and feel as though God spoke right into what I’m going through. The amazing Gift of Grace that we share cannot be measured or taken for granted. Thank you so much for re-opening my eyes to something so foundational in my walk with God. I also pray that God will bless you in your ministry.

  59. Chiderapërgjigje

    Once God shows you someone and the person has the same passion for God as you and ready to walk with you all the way. it doesn’t matter what age, once the time comes you marry. The thing is just acknowledge him in all of thy ways, he’ll make your paths straight (Fjalët e urta 3:6). Just have the passion and love for God, at the right time he’ll provide you with your helpmate who’ll stand with you through it all. Don’t wanna part, then don’t part with God. In ALL of thy ways acknowledge him, he’ell make your path straight.

  60. Stacypërgjigje

    My husband is 3/4 black and a quarter white.(Unë jam i bardhë). My husband I got married young also I 18 going to 19 and my husband was 20. People told us not to, we were making a mistake and will send in divorce. We didn’t listen we got married and now we have been 16 vjet. God is in control.

  61. jaysmithpërgjigje

    Kevin–you seem like you have a few things down. And you are working your way up. Keep going, kid! Në fund, to know yourself half as well is most of the vattle, despite any shortcomings. bekimet!

  62. TheRealHonestTruthpërgjigje

    Well for the people out there that have been BLESSED with very Excellent luck with NO health problems at all and being married with a family with a lot of money certainly have so much to be very thankful for since they really should have NO reason to complain when many of us are NOT that lucky at all even though many of you did get married too young which there are a lot of you that are still together today.

  63. RachelSanchezpërgjigje

    My husband and I got married earlier this year. He is 22, and I am 21. I get asked all the time why I wouldthrow my youth awayor why I would even think about getting married in college. I surprisingly get the most hurtful comments from older women who seem to look down on me. It’s heartbreaking that others can’t recognize that I am actually really enjoying my youth with my most favorite person in the world. It’s sad when people (even older generations) think that it’s perfectly fine for people in their 20s to sleep around, but when they get married it’s shocking and horrible. We just hope our marriage can inspire others to take the leap when they feel ready, regardless of what society tells them.